The Versatile Blogger Award

Greetings beautiful friends!… I’ve been nominated for The Versatile Blogger Award! This makes it the SECOND blogging award nominee! Many thanks to Katie from Katie Rose Loves for nominating me. Go check her out and give her a follow!

The Rules of the Versatile Blogger Award are…

1. Thank the person who gave you this award. Include a link to their blog.
2. Nominate 15 bloggers for the Versatile Blogger Award
3. Tell 7 things about yourself.

Mystery Blogger Award!

Hello my beautiful friends! It’s been several days since my last post, but I’m back… and with a blogging award nomination! I would like to thank my friend Betina for nominating me.

Okoto Enigma is the creator of this award!

RULES FOR THIS AWARD:

• Put the award logo on your blog.
• Post the rules.
• Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
• Mention the creator of the award and provide a link to their blog too.
• Tell your readers three things about yourself.
• Nominate 10-20 people for the same award.
• Notify the nominees by commenting on their blog.
• Ask your nominees 5 questions of your choice with one weird/funny question.

3 Facts

1. If I wasn’t currently an LSA, I would be working in media or studying further something related to media
2. My most prized possession(s) would probably be my non-fiction collection of books
3. I was always the dumped one in a relationship

5 Questions: Answers

1.  Sea or forest? I love nature, and it’s going to be very hard for me to choose. Since I live on an island and the closest thing to a forest is Buskett, then I’ll choose ‘forest’
2. Your favorite childhood movie? I saw a lot of movies growing up, but the ‘Home Alone’ movies with Macaulay Culkin were my sh*t. I loved him, I loved the movie plots, and I miss movies like those
3. McDonalds or Burger King? Burger King for the chicken burger, McDonald’s for the rest
4. You’re nr 1 on your travel bucket list? Liverpool and New York City
5. First thing you do if you won 1 mill euro? Travel with half of them, the other half would go to charity

5 Questions

1. Your favourite season in terms of fashion?
2. If you were any celebrity, dead or alive, who would it be and why?
3. One artist/band you want to see live?
4. How accurate is your star sign?
5. Favourite subject when you were in school (or if you still are, your current favourite)

10 Nominees

1. Style in Transit
2. Caroline: Post-Grad
3. Kezzie’s Corner
4. One Chick and a Yorkie – one of my first commenters/follows on my blog, and I freaking love her! ❤
5. Dive Inside
6. Scrabbled Rambles
7. Smashing Darling x
8. As told by Jade
9. Lola.Lolita archives x
10. Style Syco

Banggood Wishlist

Goooooooood afternoon my beautiful friends! And welcome to yet another wishlist. Can you tell I’m a dreamer with all these wishlists? I bet! Today’s wish list was brought to you by the great people from Banggood.

I’ll be honest, I’d never bought from this website before, but after seeing the things they sell, I made this wishlist with all the things I found amazing from the website.

Banggood is currently celebrating their 11th anniversary, and have these bomb promotional activities going on:

• Flash deal
  https://www.banggood.com/snapup.html?utm_source=sns&utm_medium=redid&utm_campaign=fromclairespov_11anniversary&utm_content=mickey
• Main venue
  https://www.banggood.com/11annv/11annv.html?utm_source=sns&utm_medium=redid&utm_campaign=fromclairespov_11anniversary&utm_content=mickey
• Fashion deal
  https://www.banggood.com/collection-3919.html?utm_source=sns&utm_medium=redid&utm_campaign=fromclairespov_11anniversary&utm_content=mickey

So without further ado, here is my wishlist…

 

 

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1. https://goo.gl/py2PV4
2. https://goo.gl/nTfB8v
3. https://goo.gl/W3GVYJ
4. https://goo.gl/3ipSCb
5. https://goo.gl/pYxMgh
6. https://goo.gl/MQFaZ5
7. https://goo.gl/yQVkVa
8. https://goo.gl/62UCkm
9. https://goo.gl/mjc6rj
10. https://goo.gl/TsiGvd
11. https://goo.gl/csyKQ7
12. https://goo.gl/DjvezA
13. https://goo.gl/FAuqfe

/// Number 13 is a bonus because it took me a while to decide between which dress to include, whether it was number 12 or 13… so I made the decision to include both!

As usual, I included a variety of items, spanning from clothes and beauty products to jewellery and accessories. Which of these items did you like? Check out their promotional links above for amazing offers for their eleventh anniversary!

Related: Shein Wishlist / Zaful Wishlist / Romwe Wishlist

 

 

The Symptoms of Depression Nobody Talks About

Depression is often very misunderstood. Some believe it means simply being sad and unmotivated, when in reality, the symptoms of depression often have a way of infiltrating everything, from the smallest, most unsuspecting details, to the biggest, most significant aspects. And trying to explain this often feels like trying to hold onto water.

I did a lot of research on this, both as a curious person and a sufferer of mental health illnesses, which is why it took me over two weeks to publish it.

By opening the dialogue and trying to put words to these symptoms, we can continue to deepen our understanding and unveil the misunderstanding that leads to stigma. 

Here is what I found out:

• Wanting to say what’s on your mind, but can’t explain it, so you just cry because you don’t even know what you’re feeling
• The exhaustion is equally mental as it is physical. Mental exhaustion from having to apologize for who you are, from trying to convince yourself you deserve to be alive. The physical and mental exhaustion from living in general
• The black hole felt in the core of being. It sucks in life, motivation, concentration, etc. It’s drowning in the the ocean in the middle of a tempest
• Not showering, combing your hair, brushing your teeth or changing clothes for a long time. Basically, all hygiene just goes out the window
• When having an episode but you are not so far gone, and part of your rational mind is telling you there’s no reason to feel that way, yet the dark part of your mind still won’t release its grip
• You can see and take in your surroundings, but you don’t feel a part of it, as if in a dream
• When you’re depressed, your ability to feel joy from the things you normally love fades, but the worst days are the days where you are so numb you can barely even feel compassion or empathy
• Your aching body from staying still all day, whether from laying in bed or just sitting. People think people with depression are just lazy for doing so
• Disassociation. When you are so depressed and consumed you are no longer yourself. It feels like you are in a videogame. There is no emotional connection to reality
• When you are so tired you do not manage to get to places in time. It takes you a lot of energy to get up, get ready and go
• Not knowing that something is wrong in the early stage, and hurting other people with your behavior, and this is of course not done on purpose. This results in people accusing you of the things caused by the illnesses you could not control
• The amount of migraines you struggle with when you go through depressive episodes which makes dealing with everything a million times harder
• Anger, agitation, irritability and the feeling of having little to no self-control. This often gets to a point where you cannot bottle it up anymore, and you go down a downward spiral over the simplest, smallest of things because you cannot manage your emotions. Basically, depression is anger turned inwards
• Thinking depression will be passed on to your children, and you cannot explain this because it is not tangible. Fact: children are more likely to develop mental health problems if their parents experienced them
• This one is for the ladies: your period reacts to your emotional stress level and depression can cause you so much stress because people don’t understand, your period sometimes either stops or it just keeps going and becomes super irregular and painful
• You are not able to talk and voice your thoughts because depression makes you believe your opinion does not matter
• Sometimes you think: am I just exhausted because of my sleep schedule? Or because my mind hasn’t stopped working or stressing for days? That constant need to rationalize your mental health makes the depression symptoms even worse
• Preoccupation. Depression can make you preoccupy yourself with game apps and simple things I know I can do or change because I feel that I can’t change or control anything else in my life
• Promiscuity. You get so down and depressed you just want to do anything to feel better, even though you hurt yourself at the same time
• The internal frustration that you are too scared, guilty or embarrassed to speak out because there is still so much stigma and lack of services, and people who say they are there for you when actually they aren’t. So you just end up drowning in your own thoughts and your depression or anxiety worsens

• Paranoia. You think that people are getting annoyed with you and the awful symptoms
• One minute you’re having fun with your friends and family, and then it hits you hard and begin to shut down without an explanation, nothing to have triggered it. Suddenly you have trouble enjoying yourself with people you are happy around
• Foggy thinking, making it impossible to concentrate or remember anything
• Gaining weight because you don’t know what else to do. Or the weight loss because you are just not hungry and don’t have the energy to cook
• You’re guilty all the time. Hurting friends and family, lying about why you can’t do something or go somewhere, not going to work, staying in bed all day, not taking proper care of your responsibilities… It’s consuming and never ending
• The uncertainty. You don’t know if you’re going to wake up in the same horrid mood, a worse or better one. Not knowing if one day you’re going to stop functioning. Not knowing whether you will be able to keep your job while keeping your head above water
• Cancelling plans last minute, having your friends and family think you don’t love then when this occurs constantly
• You don’t know if your thoughts are real of just effects of depression feeding you lies. You feel betrayed by your own brain and you’re not able to distinguish the true and depressive thoughts
• The need to put on an act so everyone thinks you are OK, but inside you feel worthless. Sometimes you just want to shout that you are suffering and cannot cope, but you’re made to feel like you are not allowed to show weakness. The exhaustion and the physical pain caused by holding back tears because you have to appear to function well at home, at work and in social situations
• Not knowing how to explain why you are depressed. People constantly ask you “What’s making you depressed?” or “Why are you depressed?”. It’s hard to keep saying that you have no clue. Because if you knew, you would have loved telling them and fix it, but it’s tough… you just don’t know why. You just are
• Awareness. Awareness of all the things that are wrong, but the inability to fix any of it
• The physical and emotional pain and weariness and feeling like you have to apologize for all of it. It’s exhausting!
• Wanting to put yourself in dangerous situations. Depression isn’t always about laying in your bed, it also can be the urge to be self-destructive. People don’t talk about this because it’s a kind of a grey space. You’re not really suicidal, but you have a kind of urge to put yourself in dangerous situation
• When you’re typically a super responsible, organized person, and you slowly feel all of it start to unravel. You start showing up late to work, falling behind on tasks, stop eating, start praying that your kids (if you have them) won’t notice and you put on that fake smile and try to keep it all together. Through tears and self-doubt, you pull through for them because they need you
• Thinking you’re no longer in love with the love of your life. Becoming paranoid of them thinking they’re bad for you. It causes the partner to feel unloved, no matter if you still say ‘I love you,’ they can feel it
• When every decision, no matter how small or big, becomes an insurmountable burden because of your indecisive mind. Then the guilt of having made a decision that always seems to be the wrong one. And then more guilt that makes you think you are useless to anyone in the world including yourself
• Selfishness. You tend to isolate yourself and put your depression first, and the rest second. Depression takes the spotlight, and everyone and everything else is in the backseat
• Constipation. Whether it’s because of something bad you ate, the medication or because all you do is sleep. It takes you weeks to start getting back to normal, and nothing prolongs the cloud in your head than feeling bloated and sick on top of lack of motivation and self-deprecation

It is important to remember that no matter how much you are struggling or how overwhelming your symptoms may feel, you are never alone and you are worthy and deserving of help.

Romwe Wishlist

Related post: Zaful Wishlist / Shein Wishlist

Like I did with Zaful and Shein, I decided to create a wishlist from Romwe, another website that sells fashionable yet oh-so VERY fashionable clothes, shoes and accessories. The links to the objects I chose for my wishlist are in order of the pictures.

1. https://goo.gl/Ly4bx4
2. https://goo.gl/PvDGm6
3. https://goo.gl/r6jYLr
4. https://goo.gl/afSH8a
5. https://goo.gl/m3rVpS
6. https://goo.gl/wx73yM
7. https://goo.gl/BcTkoM
8. https://goo.gl/fKqfEP
9. https://goo.gl/LHDaSx
10. https://goo.gl/GaTZ78
11. https://goo.gl/7P2pYb
12. https://goo.gl/j4J1EJ

I decided to broaden my wishlist to not just articles of clothing, but also accessories. Usually when I search for clothes I search for simple, plain colours/patterns. But since it’s about time to start experimenting with fashion (I am 23 and not getting any younger), I also mixed things up with more colours and patterns.

The most you will see are florals. I am falling in love more each day with this print and have more floral printed clothes than I should have. I am also loving culottes, even though I am yet to own my first pair.

What do YOU like from Romwe? Anything I should consider to buy? Let me know in the comments below!

Shop your Back to School outfits HERE!
Zaful whole site coupon

50 Questions Tag

1. What’s your favorite candle scent?

 Anything that has jasmines smells soooo damn good to me.

2. What female celebrity do you wish was your sister?

 Jennifer Lawrence, because who else?

3. What male celebrity do you wish was your brother?

Probably John Lennon. He’s cool.

4. How old do you think you’ll be when you get married?

I don’t have a particular age in mind, nor do I want to get married to my boyfriend – I prefer a long relationship than marriage – but maybe sometime before we hit 30 years old.

5. Do you know a hoarder?

Before I spring-cleaned my room a few months ago, no. After that, yes: myself. I had all sorts of things dating over ten years. TEN. YEARS.

6. Can you do the splits?

Nope. Not now or before or ever.

7. How old were you when you learned how to ride a bike?

… I never did.

8. How many oceans have you swam in?

Just the Mediterranean Sea in three different countries: Malta, Gozo and Sicily.

9. How many countries have you been to?

Tunisia, Spain, France, Sicily, Italy, England, Budapest, Austria… so that’s eight.

10. Is anyone in your family in the army?

Nope.

11. What would you name your daughter if you had one?

Anything Beatles-related – Julia, Michelle, Jude, Cynthia, Eleanor, Belle, Ebony, Stella and a lot more that cannot come to mind – and I also like Emma, Coraline, Dharla, Olivia, Lyla, Daisy, Lily, Daria, Dhalia and Emily.

12. What would you name your son if you had one?

Like the previous answer, anything Beatles-related – John, Paul, George, Harrison, Lennon, Mccartney, Julian, Dhani, Sean, Zak, Daniel, Michel and a lot more that cannot come to mind – and I also like Daniel, Noah, Kurt, Axl, Jimmy, Oliver, Logan and Alexander.

13. What’s the worst grade you got on a test?

Between 30 and 50 in Math.

14. What was your favorite TV show when you were a child?

That’s a long list, but anything I saw on Disney Channel, Power Rangers and anything I watched before I went to school (which were all Italian dubbed).

15. What did you dress up as on Halloween when you were eight?

Nothing. In Malta, we only started celebrating Halloween in the past ten years

16. Have you read any of the Harry Potter, Hunger Games or Twilight series?

I’m currently on the third book of the Harry Potter series… is that bad? The rest no, and not interested.

17. Would you rather have an American accent or a British accent?

British… preferably Scouse or Irish.

18. Did your mother go to college?

Nope.

19. Are your grandparents still married?

Yes, even though one grandpapa passed away.

20. Have you ever taken karate lessons?

No, but I’d like to try!

21. Do you know who Kermit the frog is?

Who doesn’t?

22. What’s the first amusement park you’ve been to?

I think it’s one in Tunisia, over 10 years ago.

23. What language, besides your native language, would you like to be fluent in?

I used to be very fluent in French, but after I stopped studying it, I forgot how to speak it, so I’d like to re-start. I’d also like to speak Irish.

24. Do you spell the color as grey or gray?

Grey.

25. Is your father bald?

No, almost though!

26. Do you know triplets?

Just twins.

27. Do you prefer Titanic or The Notebook?

Titanic, all the way!

28. Have you ever had Indian food?

I don’t think I have.

29. What’s the name of your favorite restaurant?

Hard Rock Cafe, hell yes!

30. Have you ever been to Olive Garden?

We don’t have one in my country.

31. Do you belong to any warehouse stores (Costco, BJ’s, etc.)?

No.

32. What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender?

I asked this to my mum yesterday because I never really asked about this, and she told me they never really had a boy’s name in mind because they’ve always wanted a girl. But then she said that dad always loved Michel.

33. If you have a nickname, what is it?

Never really had one. But I used to be called Marshmallow back in secondary school because I had an obsession with them.

34. Who’s your favorite person in the world?

My mother. She’s the absolute best person. And my boyfriend and BFF (I haven’t forgotten about you loves!).

35. Would you rather live in a rural area or in the suburbs?

Rural. I love peace and silence.

36. Can you whistle?

Yep!

37. Do you sleep with a nightlight?

I used to, but not anymore. Although my AC’s temperature is digital with a bright white LED display so hypothetically yes. I sleep with a nightlight.

38. Do you eat breakfast every morning?

Almost.

39. Do you take any pills or medication daily?

Yes, anxiety and vitamins for concentration.

40. What medical conditions do you have?

Crippling anxiety, social anxiety, depression and mild OCD.

41. How many times have you been to the hospital?

Twice, if you count the day I was born.

42. Have you ever seen Finding Nemo?

Uhhhhhhh, who hasn’t?!

43. Where do you buy your jeans?

New Look, Peacocks, Centro Moda, Matalan…

44. What’s the last compliment you got?

“Cutie” – from my boyfriend ❤

45. Do you usually remember your dreams in the morning?

Most of the time, yes.

46. What flavor tea do you enjoy?

English breakfast, medium flavour strength.

47. How many pairs of shoes do you currently own?

Over 10… 15, 16?

48. What religion will you raise your children to practice?

I’m more a spiritual than religious person even though I was raised as one. I’ll teach my children what is right and wrong and I will respect whatever religion they want to practise.

49. How old were you when you found out that Santa wasn’t real?

I don’t remember, but I was relieved because I was dead scared of him.

50. Why do you have a blog?

 Apart from always wanting to have one, I wanted to spread awareness on mental health and body positivity and equality and love around me.

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I hope you got to know me better with this tag!

I know waaay too many bloggers, so if you’re one of them…

YOU’VE BEEN TAGGED!

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Why I Still Go to Therapy… and why it’s OK

This is probably one of those posts where I had a thousand of ideas, and yet I never really knew how to form those ideas in a decent post. That, and I found it really difficult writing this post. Because the stigma surrounding mental health is still there. I was told by my family not to write about this, but I refuse to be silenced.

I am recovering from depression and anxiety. I’m happier than I ever was, and am in a good place, both physically and mentally.

Yet I still go to psychiatric therapy. And I still take my medication.

And it’s okay.

The Leibster Award!

I was sick since Wednesday, which is why I was MIA on all my social media – that would be my Facebook page/group/personal profile, Instagram and such. But I’m feeling better because, guess what? I got nominated for my SECOND blogging award, the Leibster!

I got nominated by the lovely Tracy (hint: if you’re into book/series/video game reviews, give her a follow!).

Rules are simple: answer 11 questions, come up with 11 questions of your own, nominate 11 people. But I’m ignoring the last part.

So without further ado, here are my answers to Tracy’s questions!

“It started like any normal conversation would.” – An Account of an Abuse of Title

Someone I know approached me to write this story about an experience she had. * Names have been either omitted or changed to protect the people’s identities. I only ask for respect in the comments. There may be sexual content, so viewer discretion is advised.

Post is really long, sorry!